these words hang in my living room. they were once true. they aren't anymore. i have a reputation for being "lazy" at a hospital in Cleveland because i refused to work 15 hour days. this gossip doesn't come from my superiors, who lauded my boundaries to care for myself, and my self-awareness that a specialty requiring this kind of deprivation of sleep, nourishment, and play would not be in my future. no, dear reader - this judgment and spite came from my peers. it leaves me wondering: how did our community become so broken?
hustle culture infused into medicine when profit focused interests recognized medical trainees were already primed for overwork without complaint or protest. freshly minted medical students are so full of gratitude for the opportunity to be here, they're unable to see that the embroidered white coats are as token as brands flying pride flags and making rainbow shoes. corporate healthcare systems see these new crops of medical students, ever more competitive with each other, and their eyes glint with dollar signs as they realize that not only are we silent about the lack of work hour protections and labor laws that apply to literally every other worker in the country, we also come fully trained to shame each other for admitting our own human energetic and emotional capacities. medical schools and hospital systems know that we won’t say no, because we don’t even support our colleagues in delineating boundaries for work, play, and rest. the executives took notes on what we tell each other: “don’t you care about your patients?” “that’s selfish.” “it’s your job. they are depending on you.”
dear future healer, hustle culture is killing you.
you were not made to work ceaseless, consecutive twelve hour days. you do not need to work yourself to exhaustion to earn a day to sleep in, to repot your house plants, to nap in the sunshine, to read books with your children. the irony of your life is that you’ve dedicated yourself to health and care, but sacrificed your ability to obtain either one - for you cannot care for others if you do not first care for your Self. who taught you to treat your precious Self like this? who taught you to celebrate feeling like this?
dear future healer, stop accepting the terms They dole out. if others depend on you, YOU make the rules.
your body, your soul, depend on you - is it selfish to give her what she needs?
dear future healer, this system won't change to save you. (need i remind you of the countless casualties of the pandemic?)
dear future healer, your life is in your own hands. what kind of life will you choose?